MYTH #1: You have to be a medium

That you need a psychic or a medium or “special” to connect you to the other side.

The erroneous notion that ONLY mediums see ghosts and apparitions.

And ordinary people don’t.

The truth?

The OVERWHELMING majority of all spirit communication experiences happen to average people who have no special gifts.

Often, they don’t even BELIEVE in spirits when they see one. (as was the case with me)

The facts are simple:

Millions of people will have spontaneous experiences with apparitions, ghosts, and seeing, sensing or feeling the spirit of loved ones who have crossed, every year.

The vast majority of these people seek no fame or fortune, and rarely tell their stories to anyone outside of immediate family. (many are hesitant to even do that)

Spontaneous, unplanned, and totally surprising experiences like ADC’s (after death communications) represent the vast majority of all spirit communication.

As a matter of fact, many people will turn TO a medium after having an experience like this, as they want to have another.

Or, they need a sanity check, and want to make sure they aren’t crazy, or are just so mystified by the experience that they want validation or confirmation from a “professional”

In truth, if you read my first book WHEN SPIRIT SPEAKS, you’ll know that this is exactly what happened to me, and what propelled me into this wild, weird, wacky and wonderful world of psychic phenomena in the first place.

A quick recap:

I was an agnostic, and totally disinterested in spiritual matters of any kind.

When I had what is referred to as a “crisis apparition” where a friend of mine, a co-worker who lived and worked more than 2000 miles away and in a different US time zone, appeared to me, in my bedroom, in the middle of the night to say goodbye.

We didn’t speak.

But telepathically, I understood with crystal clear clarity that he was letting me know that he had to go.

Of course, I did my best to try to convince myself it was the strangest dream of my life .

I might have even succeeded, if it wasn’t for the fact that, when I went to work the next day, I discovered this close friend and coworker and confidence had unexpectedly perished in the middle of the night, at or about the same time as my experience.

I won’t retell the whole story here (it’s in my last book and our blog) but the experience was so out of my comfort zone, so incredibly odd, unsettling, unexpected, exciting, inspiring and even a bit spooky as well, that it precipitated a series of HUGE life changes.

It led led me to re-think everything I believed about life, death, karma, connection, spirituality and the overarching purpose that each of us is given.

An experience with a well known medium thereafter, as I searched for answers, was a very important piece of my own puzzle, and spiritual progress, and was certainly helpful.

But the medium wasn’t nearly as life changing as my OWN intimate experience with spirit.

THAT was personal. And I knew in my blood and my bones….it was REAL.

No medium could give me more than what I experience on my own.

Personal, intimate, direct proof that there IS in fact something that persists after our physical body dies. (or, that there is something MORE than the body that at least for a moment, can “project” itself thousands of miles away at the point of death)

I also learned that this experience, called a crisis apparition is very, very common.

And that there are hundreds of books that describe thousands of experiences JUST like mine that cut across many cultures, countries and even centuries of human history.

It was an exciting epiphany that filled my life with passion and purpose and a child like sense of wonder that had never been there before.

It was truly like being born again, and seeing LIFE clearly for the very first time.

The same experiences are available to you. Some happen spontenously. Other take effort.

And if you’ve lost a loved one, I promise.

A medium is NOT necessary to discover the same truth for yourself.

*Also note: Many mediums don’t see spirit in a traditional way as I described above, either.

They connect in ways that are unique and quite individual to their own skills, strengths, abilities and experience.

Some see.

Some hear.

Some get symbols.

After Death Communication can come in all shapes and sizes,much like those we look to connect with.

I have friends who have never seen a spirit, but who, when using some of the practices I describe in detail below, will smell the distinct perfume of a mother.

Or, hear the beautiful sound from the piano that their father loved to play with crystal clarity, even though the piano is long gone as well.

Rooms can fill up with sounds, smells, colors, hot, cold, a rush of wind is a very common feeling that many people report BOTH during an ADC, as well as when losing a loved one as well.

(sometimes this rush of wind is described by multiple people in multiple places, ALL at the moment of death)

The key takeaway?

There is a certainty, a confidence and an extraordinary knowing that takes place when you have an authentic communication with spirit.

You continue to build on that experience over time.

While it’s nice for future validation, you certainly do NOT need to be a medium to discover that for yourself.

MYTH #2: Spirit communication is silly and unscientific, and has no basis in ordinary reality.

In other words, if you see a ghost? Keep it to yourself.**

I’m going to say something a bit odd here. Communication with a spirit is NOT paranormal.

It’s actually quite normal.

It’s only paranormal because the people who get to decide what is “normal” tell us that spirits can’t exist.

Think of it this way:

When MILLIONS of people have the same experience after the death of someone they love, and when that experience is shared by folks from different cultures, different continents, and different centuries of human history and looks the SAME when reported back, i think it’s safe to say, that is the DEFINITION of normality.

It’s NORMAL to have an experience with a loved one. Not paranormal.

Ask a hospice nurse.

Or ask an emergency room physician working in the cardiac care unit.

Some studies show that 70+% of parents who lose a child will have an after death communication.

Other studies show that 50% of spouses will have a visitation experience.

RECENT surveys done reflect that more than 60% of HOSPICE nurses and professional end of life care givers have or witness exceptional, end of life experiences with patients.

The truth is, those that work on a daily basis with the dying, commonly witness profound and transformative experiences.

Often, these are death bed visions, where patients, days, or hours or even minutes from death, are having incredible, lucid and vivid encounters with loved ones on the other side who have come to greet them.

This is very similar to what is described by people who have had a near death experience, and have reported what it felt like to cross the threshold between both worlds.

There are thousands of these cases on record, many witnessed by doctors, nurses, family members, and more….and often where details provided by the loved ones about to cross were unknown to them and yet 100% true.

And yet, when we talk about these topics of universal import, and with literally millions of people around the globe at any given point having had one of these encounters?

We’re told it can’t happen.

To keep quiet.

Because it’s “PARANORMAL”. And who wants to feel NOT normal when it comes to matters of sanity?

You want to know what’s funny?

They tell us it’s okay to be clinically depressed after a loved one dies, because THAT is to be expected, because it’s “normal”.

Yet, to have an experience with that loved one after they’re gone, which MILLIONS of otherwise perfectly sane people have each and every year is called a “hallucination”, or “unhinged”, simply because those same doctors and pharmaceutical companies tell us it’s not 🙂

It’s ironic of course, that one of the very BEST (and obvious) ways to overcome the depression that follows losing someone you’ve lost is to have an experience that suggests that they are still with you.

And accessible.

That you CAN (and will) be able to see them again, even NOW if you choose.

When THAT happens, we are told to keep quiet and stay sad. Because it’s better to be depressed and “normal” than nuts!

I find that funny, and truthfully, a bit sad.

Simply because a little bit of awareness, and experience and personal proof, can help change.

The truth is, in MY view, our job as caretakers for our communities is to reduce the suffering we see in the world.

To help people, heal people, and to offer up our authentic, experience in ways that makes the world a better place.

So that is what I hope to do here.

The path you are on right now is going to help you discover that for yourself.

MYTH #3: That spirit communication has no benefit

As we touched on above, it has incredible benefits.

I’ve talked with, and worked with hundreds of people who have spent years clinically depressed after losing a loved one.

Not being able to eat, sleep, work, live, love and exist in the world as they once did….especially in the case of a sudden passing, a child’s death or extraordinary circumstances like suicide.

Yet, ONE medium reading, with an evidential medium who is really GOOD, or better yet, having an authentic experience of their own, can transform that grief into gratitude, and provide INSTANT healing and hope that can last a lifetime.

Every time I hear people attack those of us who work in this field – or who believe in the healing value of working with afterlife encounters – exploring these areas with an OPEN mind and a curious spirit, I am reminded of how many people I’ve seen transformed from these amazing experiences.

Are there people out there who are “bad” mediums or who will sell snake oil to the grieving in an attempt to provide false help to the helpless?

Of course there are.

But there are bad lawyers, bad bakers and bad candlestick makers as well.

More people have been forever changed by beautiful experiences with spirit than have ever been “snookered” by a fake medium or by a fortune teller with an eye on taking advantage.

As I write these words,someone, somewhere is having some sort of incredible, unexpected and completely life changing spiritual experience of one kind or another.

By the time I finish the next sentence, so too will another.

To write off an an entire domain of human experience, and perhaps the most beautiful and meaningful one at that as silly or superficial, in my view, is just ridiculously wrong.

It’s also a big reason why there is such a stigma about GENUINE spirituality in our culture.

And such despair about dying as well.

Exploring this field of human experience WILL change your life.

Of that I am certain.

It’s healing and hopeful and the most amazing and life changing paradigm shifting and perspective busting experience you can have.

It FREES you to be authentically you.

To live without fear.

One of my favorite quotes comes from a talk I heard Anita Moorjani give, a few years ago. Anita had one of the most remarkable NDE experiences and is a bright and beautiful light of hope and inspiration.

But the single sentence she gleaned from her own NDE, was the most profound part of her experience for me.

She heard, before she was “sent” back:

“Now that you know the truth, go back and live your life fearlessly”

How would you live differently if you knew, without any shadow of a doubt, that there was more to your personal identity than the “box” we are born in?

What would a fearless life look like for you? This is the simple, profound freedom that comes from this path.

The freedom to be ourselves, fully and freely and fully embracing our frailties and transcending our fears.

This is the most magnificent, magical and mysterious experience we can have as human beings.

Toreconsider, at our core, what it means to be ALIVE and awake and fully ourselves!

**Why Personal Proof Matters Most**

Because no matter how much you enjoy these words, and how inspired or encouraged or comforted you may be from reading MY experience, nothing is close to having your own.

There is no substitute for “knowing” in the very fabric of your being, at your very core.

Having something so incredible and inspiring happen that offers you a real, first hand perspective that offers proof is will change your life.


I personally believe that this whole field of knowledge, these incredibly inspiring experiences with spirit, not only destroys the fear of dying, but they radically reduce another even MORE important fear that many of us live with every day.

The fear of LIVING.

Living with fullness and passion and purpose and with the joy and juice of TRULY enjoying being alive.

After all….

If you are certain that there is no death, how much differently would you react when someone you loved loses the use of their physical body?

How much would YOU fear risk? How many more adventures would you take in the pursuit of PASSION and purpose?

How many more opportunities would you find to discover a sense of inspired excitement at the challenges that every day offers?

When you truly come to know that consciousness, or the REAL you – is not your body, it’s BEHYOND your body, something changes.

Not in a small way. In an earth shattering and exciting way.

All of these experiences give us the evidence, and the ammunition to know that our lives DO matter.

Your LOVES do matter.

How you treat people counts.

And the consciousness that you cultivate is truly the best indicator of not only the joy and juice you’ll get out of THIS life, but out of what follows as well.

You get the afterlife you most richly deserve.

What you cultivate, with your consciousness, and your kindness and creativity, and your connection to your community and the lives you touch with care and compassion, is what waits for us all.

That’s what ALL of these experiences teach us. Not just the ones we’re talking about in this book. But everything from NDE’S, to past life memories, to deep spiritual experiences of oneness and connection, to deathbed visions, to messages from mediums and so much more.

And that’s why it matters so much to learn them why we can.

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